September 25, 2010

Breastfeeding: parting is such sweet sorrow =(

I have officially. 

There.  I said it.  It's final.

It's been a slow dripping process.  Less and less breast-milk, more and more formula.  I said it last week too (secretly to myself), but I didn't follow through.  Every morning when Seba would wake up I'd scoop him up, bring him over to our room and breastfeed him.  I told myself it was mainly for him -- he likes it -- it's comforting and snuggly for him --- but as I was repeating this thought to my friend Trish, I started giggling realizing that the morning and evening breastfeeding routine was more for me than for the little prince.  After all it wasn't really filling his belly anymore.  It was just so much easier (for me) to latch him on and stay in bed than to run downstairs and make a bottle -- plus... putting an end to breastfeeding is a step towards him growing-up....sigh/frown/grunt ( ??? it's depressing... i can grunt if I want to!)

And so I lied -- our continued routine was more for me.

It's been a week now and things are going much better than I imagined.  I think it's because we combined the end of breastfeeding with the beginning of the floor-bed.  Before, he'd wake up and call out for us... and I, being lazy, would  pop him on the breast and fall back asleep with him eating.  Now with his bed on the floor he wakes up and plays -- delaying his feeding time by at least a couple hours his until he comes and wakes Stefano and I up. It's great, because he's aware of his hunger -- he comes to our room when hunger strikes.  This is a big difference from before: he'd wake up and eat immediately only because he couldn't stay unattended or I initiated it. 
I think a lot of parents tend to this -- we feed not only on our baby's demand, but also on our own demand -- not always, but sometimes,  instead of finding something to occupy our children... instead of figuring out what they really want -- we simply feed them.  
I remember our first doctor's appointment with Seba -- the paediatrician said: "sometimes when a baby is fussy, they simply want to suck something... you need to understand the difference between this and hunger."  She was right.   

I began to think of this new "exercise" as cross training with seba.  When he fussed we brought him from "station" to "station" until he was pleased with what he was doing. Sometimes it meant 1) playing - uh, no thanks 2) feeding - nope, not hungry 3) warm bath? no, no gas 4) YouTube - skidamarink song? BINGO! Just tired guys -- thanks =)
Sometimes stinky just wanted to suck something -- so we gave him a pacifier (which no, he did not become addicted to.. in fact he stopped using it at 4 months!). Sometimes he just wanted attention... so we held him and hugged him (and no, he did not become a needy baby that requires constant attention -- you read it, he occupies himself for hours!).  And sometimes (most times) , he just wanted to play -  and so we played ----- A LOT.  

Can you imagine, instead, that we fed him each of these times?  Ya, he would have still eaten because he didn't know/understand the feeling of 'fullness' -- the boy would've kept going until he spit-up half of what he ate (yes, this has happened) --- Babies can just eat and eat and eat -- which is why it's recommended that they be able to sit up and move their head before they start eating solids.  They must be able to demonstrate when they don't want anymore.

That's it. We breastfed Seba, we give him formula, and now he's eating food -- real food.  He has never given us any problems.

the boy.  can.  EAT.

I wonder where he gets this from? hmm heee hmmm... it's a tie: both of us =)

So bye bye breastfeeding.  Parting is such sweet sorrow:  sad to see you leave, but thinking of the wine,  birth control and anaprox coming my way, makes it all ok.

PS.  If you can breastfeed: do it.  It's a damn amazing experience. You bond. Your baby gets the 'Cristal Brut' of all milk. You get great boobs while losing weight (for those of us who are less endowed, wink wink).  And voila! Who could ask for anything more?!  Really. Who could?

1 comment:

  1. love this post. thanks for your honesty! I stopped breast feeding very early on because I would get about an ounce at a time. My little one needed more and I simply couldn't give it to her! I felt so guilty, and a lot of people gave me a hard time (was it really their business... Uhhh NO!) looking back on it I realized I did what was best for her, I mean... she needed to eat, right? anyway love your blog, love your insight, I see myself getting reaaaall comfy reading your thoughts. :]

    sending you love from


You might also like:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...