October 20, 2011

i wish this were a "stinky naps post"...

but it's not.
it's a stinky's sick post.

ever since he started school, he's been pretty much sick the whole time. off and on.
where do you stand on the 'to send or not to send' your child to daycare when ill?
we send seba if he has a runny nose or slight cough.  but there are times when you look at your child and you know they're not well enough to go. you know they shouldn't go. stefano and i share the role of missing work when seba's sick.  stefano works from home and i have a laptop that i can sign on to work from home when needed.
about two weeks ago seba was really sick... which means not eating, not sleeping well, sore throat, cough, cold, diarrhea.  we kept him home.  on his first day back after getting better i went to pick up from school and there was a little girl lying on a cot with a rag on her head.  she had a fever.  i was shocked to see her just lying there with no mommy or daddy to comfort her. shocked to see a child so visibly ill at school.  shocked to see the other kids just playing near her open to whatever illness she had.
i know.
it's normal. kids get sick at school. parents have to work.  it's the revolving door of daycare. i get it.
but i don't.
is it horrible if i can't understand how any parent could send there 20 month-old to school ill?  is it horrible if i can't understand how an employer cannot sympathize?  is it horrible if i feel like when my child is sick people think i'm taking a vacation day?  a day of manis and pedis? a day of fun in the sun?  what a sick feeling when feel you have to show proof of just how sick your baby is that it warrants you staying home and not sending him to school.
seba woke up in the middle of the night wheezing, choking and vomiting phlegm. i thought he was going to pass out. i didn't know what was wrong with him.  i didn't know how to help. and somewhere in the back of mind, i was thinking "oh crap, how am i going to explain this to work".
being a working mother -- has made me paranoid.  although to be honest, my workplace is a high concentrated state of paranoia.  there is no trust among employees. everyone seems to be watching their backs -- always.  no one seems happy.  and if you do seem happy -- watch out because the bitter angry people won't like it. they'll want you out.
if i subtract the war zone atmosphere, i actually like my job.  i could be amazing at my job -- i want to find ways to improve the department i work in. i want to make a difference in the company... but what i hear back from employees is "nothing will ever change around here -- it is the way we are". do you know how depressing that is? to be climbing a mountain with no view of the top?
i know.
no work place is perfect.
but if we spend the majority of our waking life at work.. shouldn't we at least like what we do?  or try to?  shouldn't we be happier?
there are a few people at work that hate me. or dislike me. maybe i smile too much, i dunno.
maybe they're bitter individuals with too much space in their empty souls to hold hatred for someone they barely know.  the kind of people that have time during their work day to bad talk other employees.  the kind of people that have the time to chart my absenteeism in order to care for seba if he's ill.  the same people that take at least 5 coffee runs a day, use the bathroom a billion times, surf the net, chat on the phone, clearly have unlimited text plans on their cells... time wasters. people that sadly believe productivity is measured by time in the office rather than output.
so they chat and bad talk people they dislike, but at least it's within the walls of the company. at least they're at work.

so let me be the target in which their bullet is aimed for the time being.  let me be judged by the almighty panel of nothing-doers.  if it makes their days brighter. if it makes them feel good - who am i to stand in their way?  i'll stay home and take care of my sick child.. because i am his care-giver. because he is my son. because i love him more than anything in the world. because he is MY HAPPINESS. because i don't care about co-workers who senselessly bad-talk others in a workplace that has absolutely no competition among employees. there isn't even a horrible motive {like wanting someone else's job} to push others down.  they simply want to squash people to make themselves feel better.  these are the same people that get all giddy when they see someone in a closed door meeting with management.  the people that enjoy fear, hostility and general unhappiness in the workplace.  i can only conclude that their entire life must be a sad, sad, sad picture. poor them.

anyhow... i've wasted enough of my energy on this nothingness.
life's not always full of sunshine.  you gotta have rainy days too. but at least my family is my umbrella and they'll never let the rain get me down.

the end

disclaimer: All characters mentioned in this blog post are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. 
...or maybe not.

ps: i guess this what not a stinky's sick post after all... but a mommy's sick and tired post. hmph.

1 comment:

  1. I can relate to so much of this post.

    Kale has been sick over the past week and I blame the mother who brought her kid with CROUP to school! Yes, CROUP. Not only was I annoyed that a mother would risk the health of other kids, but I felt so awful for the little girl who was clearly not feeling well. AND - the mother is actually a teacher in a different class at the school. A school that is a really strict policy around when kids can come to school based on symptoms. Thankfully the little girl was sent home by the teacher's in Kale's class, but she was around long enough to get everyone else sick (or there was something else going around. I'm clearly bitter and blaming croup mom).

    I realize I'm lucky that both Kris and I have jobs where we can call in with no questions asked. We also have parents that can help out if needed and I know not everyone has this. But if your kid is sick - your kid is sick. You HAVE to take care of them. It's not fair to them, to the teachers, to the other kids in school, etc. to send them when they're not feeling well. You're so right, you're their CAREGIVER.

    (and now this is officially the longest comment ever).

    I also get the toxic work environment. I love my job, love the work I do, love the people in the community I get to work with. But inside the office? Hate it.

    And people wonder why bullying is exploding among kids these days...


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