June 22, 2012

currently: trying to squeeze my pregnant butt into clothes that don't fit and other nonsensical musings

i don't know why i torture myself into trying clothes on that are clearly too tight. let's bust a button or two. i like living on the edge. oh, and seba is naked with a camera in hand. just another average day. seriously.

i'm currently making a human being -- isn't that enough?  Speaking of which I remember, as child, thinking we were all human beans... ha! it kinda makes sense though -- we all start out as these little eensy weensy beans that turn into full grown babies. honestly i am still in awe that there is a little person inside my belly -- the whole pregnancy - slash - having child inside womb bewilders me. craziness. i'm sure i'm making other less important things.. but i can't think of any of them right now. also, all this human bean making has melted me down into a puddle of tears mostly listening to sarah mcLachlan's i don't know how to let you go, adia, fallen, good enough -- oh how i miss listening to and soaking up strong female voices. sarah, jewel, the cranberries, jan arden, ani defranco let's re-connect. so good in the morning. soo good. 
i'm craving chocolate.  craving, finding, buying, devouring chocolate.  what's weird is that i've had a tub of ice cream in my freezer for two weeks now, and have not yet opened it.  my chocolate craving is very specific. it's a one-chocolate-at-a-time kinda craving.  i'm still hooked on reese peanut butter cups.. but i feel this relationship is nearing its end. the desire has faded.  it could be because i ate an entire bag of mini reese cups yesterday. now the thought of them makes me cringe, but want them at the same time? sick. i'm a sick, sick, preggo woman. eating chocolate covered peanut butter cups that due to extrreme heat are slightly melted and sticky all while writing LISTS. a million lists. do this. do that. do nothing. buy this. buy that. buy everything but what is listed.  lists are fantastic and suck all at once.  they place unnecessary expectations on me... expectations i can never fulfill. but i try. diligently to complete my lists. and if i don't i just erase the things i didn't complete and trick myself into believing i have succeeded. works like a charm every time.
i've been laughing a lot lately. laughing and crying. i'm clearly hormonal and nuts.  people make me laugh. they make me cry. they make me laugh to tears. i make myself laugh a lot as well. my thoughts. my actions. all very humorous lately. but the best laughs have been the real, deep, genuine ones that seba gives me. he just blabs non-stop now.. and every sentence that comes out of his little mouth gives me a smile, chuckle, or full laugh. the kid is clearly a comedian. i'd share some with you, but it wouldn't be as funny... i'd just be one of those parents that repeat proud stories of their child and you'd just be one of those people that listen, smiling politely, laughing when appropriate.. but just not getting it. so let's call it even and pretend the whole conversation already took place and we all agree my child is the funniest bean to ever live. yah.

so this was my post for randalin's currently link-up. click below to read what the others are up to.  or join in? do your own currenly post and link-up with randalin. i love these posts... mainly because they push me to write. period.  it's almost like being in school and having a concrete deadline. i feel guilty if i forget or don't participate. plus the categories release my poor over-worked brain from thinking more than it already does. too many thoughts not enough room. you should see my the notepad on my phone. just disgusting. anyhow click below.

Harvesting Kale

June 18, 2012

dear daddy

you say go, go, go - while i say slow down. you say jump and soar -  while is say hold my hand. you stay still and watch him trip and fall from afar -  while i tiptoe behind him using every ounce of self restraint not to scoop him up an protect him from the inevitable.

it's just as we are meant to be. blending and balancing. nurturing and protecting. loving each other. loving him.

even though you drive me nuts with your hands-on, wild, and spontaneous approach to parenting -- i know that this is exactly what seba needs. you are the exact picture of a the best father i could have ever imagined for our son and i love you a million times over.

happy daddy's day stefano -- i cannot wait for the day when i will turn to our boys and say, "you're just like your father."


June 12, 2012

currently.. way off track with my days and i wanted this to be a thursday post

but clearly following through with my plans is not my forte. it's monday night, but by the time i actually post this it will probably be tuesday. i'm not going to have photos again because i've just recently been informed by blogger that i've reached my photo upload quota. question: how can someone who hardly ever blogs reach the limit?  on the other hand at least i've reached something. i'm accomplished.  oh you know, i have to upgrade because i'm such a great photo-uploader. lisa, the photo-upload over-achiever. 

speaking of over-achieving, two weeks in a row -- here we go! 

reading: i feel like lying. claiming that i am reading some interesting novel that i can't bare to tear myself away from, and if people i actually know didn't read this blog, it would probably fly.. but since that isn't the case,  i'm pretty sure someone would rat me out in the comments. and so here i am telling you that i'm currently reading NOTHING.  i love to read.  before seba joined us i was an avid reader.  obsessive.  when i'd go on vacation at least 1/2 my suitcase would be books. i miss reading, but i honestly can't find the time to keep up with it.  so my reading life has been narrowed down to a once-a-month copy of House & Home that I read in the bath while inhaling a chocolate bar.  reese's peanut butter cups going strong two weeks in a row!

loving: my deep and profound conversations with Seba the two-year-old toddler. today's main conversation was something like this:
seba: mommy seba cacca potty.
me: seba, do you have to go potty?
seba: i do it. seba cacca potty. (he goes to the bathroom, i continue preparing dinner)
seba: mommy. mommy. come. come. seba cacca. potty.
me: are you done yet? call mommy when you're all done. ok?
seba: mommy come. come. come. potty. 
me: (standing at bathroom door) yes seba?
seba: mommy. seba cacca. moo cacca. cacca moo. and aly eat bread. (aly is his cousin)
me: what? (yes i know i should say pardon me, blah. blah. blah. i forget)
seba: cacca moo. moo is cow. cow cacca. moo cacca. sit mommy. sit down. seba big cacca. cacca moo. (not sure where he got this amazing ability to make comparisons. but i'm sure if he ever sees a cow's crap, he'll realize the inaccuracy of his observation).

eating: {ok, so i'm not at the limit limit... i'm at 86% - it was just a warning. i could delete the whole "i am an over-achiever comment up there.. but why?}

 fruit smoothies with sparkling water
homemade juice! -- proving a little difficult... mainly because it requires effort. but so worth it.

looking forward to:  i'm not really looking forward to anything right now. i'm happy where i am. looking forward to every moment of everyday. appreciating the now.  i had a few busy weeks helping my dearest friend with her wedding -- which was absolutely the best wedding of all time.  so for now i'm just enjoying my down time. 

congratulations, you made it to the end! click here now to claim your prize:
Harvesting Kale

i feel like i should re-read this for spelling and grammatical errors. but i'm craving chocolate. i'm dehydrated. and i'm tired.

June 5, 2012

thursdayness: a blog link-up with randalin @ harvesting kale

i know it's not thursday, but in my defence i did write this post last thursday. i planned on adding photos to it, then forgot about it and now here i am posting it almost a week later sans photos. shocking, i know. so i'm not changing the post title and that's that. 

i think a blog link-up is some sort of social thingamagig where bloggers all focus on the same topic and then we can somehow link back to one original blogger who will then have links for all the other blogs that participated. i might be way off on this, but it sounds close enough to be almost right.  either way, i'm participating.  i am a participator.  i am connecting and doing something social.  go me, go.

i am about to list my currently themes... but you should know that being pregnant causes them to change dramatically from day to day. i could probably do a currently post everyday and it would just blow your mind. and mine.

anyhow... we're off!

cooking: pasta.  if cooking is included in all forthcoming currently posts you can pretty much be sure i'll just be typing *see week 1*.  i do cook other things. sometimes -- chicken, steak...maybe once a week. rice - pretty much never. bread, pizza.  i love to eat. like really, really, really, really  love to eat. and so cooking is mandatory. if i must get specific, today i'm going to cook filet mignon with sauteed mushrooms and onions. we'll eat it with a baguette. and we'll drink carbonated water.  then i'll probably inhale a caramilk chocolate bar for dessert.  {edit: i did cook this last thursday and did all of the above with grace and perfection. as for today, today - i made crepes with prosciutto, arugula, mushrooms and onions. they were polished off with a reese's peanut butter cup: caramilk has been replaced. i will miss him dearly}

wearing:  one of 4 maternity tank tops i caved and purchased a couple weeks ago. it's all about the length.  i actually thought i could make it through this pregnancy with all my regular, non-maternity clothes until one day i felt wind on my belly and realized my shirts were shrinking. 4 long tank tops. i will wear them until i can't wear them anymore. they will be my summer. paired with thrifted skirts and harem pants. sandals on mah feet. so much easier than a winter pregnancy of  jackets and sweaters, jeans and dress pants. blah. blah. blah. note to you: have a summer baby - you get to wear skirts and tanks the whole way through and bonus: outdoor birthday parties. it's a win-win situation no matter which way you look at it. except for the sweat and swelling of course. {edit: it has become shockingly cold since writing this post, and i am now forced to wear my tanks under long-sleeved tops that are possibly too short, paired with jeans that don't button. no sandals. no fun}

wanting: chocolate.

listening to: seba moan and groan. poor boy has strep throat. you know he actually started moaning "mamma" a couple days ago and me, being the bright light bulb that i am, didn't even realize he may have been coming down with something.  i figured he was hitting an 'i will moan and whine for my mother constantly' stage.  i was already trying to figure out the best strategy for diffusing it as quickly and moan-free as humanly possible. {edit: the boy is healed. thank the lord. i now listen to various remixes of songs by seba. how he manages to start with old mac donald, followed by twinkle twinkle, blended into frere jacques and perfectly ending with bingo is beyond me. the boy is clearly a lyrical genius.}

watching: nothing. we barely watch tv - not because we are those parents/people who believe tv is the devil and renders our brains useless, possibly inducing us into mini-comas (which it probably does) -- but because we're just not interested in anything besides two programs: grey's anatomy (which had the season finale last week) and hockey (which i've been told is currently running the stanley cup playoffs). besides tv i'm watching seba grow, water boil, laundry pile up, boobs swell and a belly to match. i don't think i'm missing out on much.  i wouldn't mind watching the black that is the inside of my eyelids a little more. i'm tired. and exhausted.  but push on i will.  oh yes. forgot -- i'm also watching what i eat. and i mean this literally. actually looking at the trashy junk that i'm about to inhale and then inhaling it. i tend to rub my double chin while chewing.

i really did want to add photos to this post, but honestly it's too late for effort right now. and so i leave you wanting more. lisa the tease, that's me.


ps. randalin: i deserve an 'A' for at least completing the task right? i think it was supposed to be a little more interesting - maybe with links and cool things of interest.  instead it's just about me. i may have missed something. or i'm just an egocentric blabber. probably a little bit of both. or a lot.

 click here now for an idea of what this post was really supposed to be like:
Harvesting Kale

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